Old Photo’s and Echoing Dreams

On occasion I write more along the lines of poetic journaling then as an informational blog post. Below is one of my experiences in downsizing our home and the emotional balancing act of choosing what to keep and why.

The large 16×20 photo looks like something out of a 1970’s Home and Gardens magazine. Each child posed perfectly by the unseen photographer. Her in a pale-yellow dress, long hair down her back and a large matching bow atop her head.

His dark hair a contrast to everything light about her. His eyes ebony and his smile a little unsure. These two children loved each other deeply already. Him just 10 months and her almost 5 they had been together for all but the first 4 days of his life.

“How would you like to get a brother today?” the lady on the other end of the phone asked. I’ll never forget that call. So much hope. So many adventures. Such unforeseen heartache.

The photo had been in the garage atop a pile of other things for two weeks. What to do with a photo like that?

Keep it? For what? Who else would want it? No one. Throw it away? Oh Lord, what would our mother say?

I saw it each time I came home from work and each morning as I left. It made my heart hurt a little every time. What am I supposed to do with that big, outdated photo of two kids who haven’t spoken in years?

“You are no longer those children” my heart realized one afternoon. “And that is why you ache at the thought of throwing it away”.

How nice it would be to be those two kids again, loving each other. Playing together. Each liking who the other was.

But that time is past now. And while the memory is sweet, the photo is faded and the two children portrayed no longer exist.

The ache remains after having thrown the photo away. But it had never really been about the picture. It was always about the loss of each to the other and the shattered dreams of the people they had hoped they would be.

Holidays like Halloween (Is it really even a holiday?)

I started writing a post about Christmas and gifts and what our family does (which I’ll post a little later) but while writing I realized we do a pretty cool thing for Halloween as well. And believe it or not, this tradition was started prior to realizing a more minimal way of living.

Each Fall, some of the adults in our family gather the babies (anyone under 16 qualifies) and we go to the pumpkin patch. We go on a Saturday morning and we drink some cider, eat some of those baby donuts, and we wander around looking at all the goats and pigs and ponies. We have been known to take the kids down a slide or take cute photos as they come around in the kids sized train. Whatever we do, it seems to always result is someone covered in hay.

But the real reason for going is for the pumpkins. We get a couple large wagons and we begin the trek through the pumpkin patch looking for the perfect ones to either carve or decorate. We inspect dozens and buy almost as many. Big ones, round ones, tall ones, white ones and of course, baby ones. (And the occasional gourd too!)

The next day, the entire family gets together for carving, painting or decorating along with pizza and football. We’ve been doing this tradition for about 8 years now and it marks one of my favorite times of year and family events.

The reason I wanted to share this is that it is perfect for those of us who have downsized or are choosing a more minimal lifestyle. The pumpkins make great decorations and fun family entertainment, and when the season is over they are bio-degradable and do not need storing! Each person can decorate or carve however they want to, encouraging creativity even with the slimy insides and in the end no closet space will be needed to store it. Win!

For a holiday that I might say I’m not a huge fan of (mostly because the concept of buying candy to give to strangers so my kids can go to a strangers and ask for candy never really made sense to me) I do enjoy this family tradition that not only allows for fun family time, it also affirms our dedication to minimalism.

What does your Halloween look like? Any ghoulish idea’s for fun filled, minimal impact, decorating or dressing up? Please share.

Happy Fall everyone! See you at the pumpkin patch.

~rache